Forgot How

I'm sorry love. I forgot how to be myself regardless of whether you accept me or not. I'm sorry, love. I forgot how to be happy in the face of adversity and poverty. I'm sorry my love, I let past hurts and mundane life move me from your arms. It hurt when you forgot how to love me unconditionally. It hurt when you refused to love my lover. But I was wrong. I never should have said we break apart forever. That was cruel. I forgot how to love you too. I release you of my conditions. Do not live in the skin I designed and I will love you naked as I came and perfect as you are. Sister of my heart, my pack.

A Howling

The trouble is last year I was slow. I felt I was saving up my energies. It was all potential and then it exploded into a kinetic awakening of the soul. This year I don't have time to save up. This year I only have time and energy to go, travel, create, open, realize, believe, dance. 

This year is for being. This year is for believing everyday. It is a year for accepting joy instead of accepting misery. This year is for Discovering myself. Discovering functions of myself, wants, needs, loves, spirit, the spiraling dancing Rose girl that now lives with me. It was nice to meet her and I will never leave her side again. It is a year for the wildish woman. A year for the healer, the healer of self wounds. This is a year for the brightest of moons and the warmest of summers, the secret darknesses and the discovery of the stars cold shine. This year is just like any other year. These days are the same as the ones before, but I am different. I have awakened and I will not sleep again.I will hold my bones to me and I will sing up the stones of my heart. I will listen to the wind as she sings to me of forgotten words. I will crack the ice of my soul up against my rib cage and start a fire within me. The deep well within me is now filled, I have wadded within and found the waters to be like color and sound. This is a new beginning born from death of many endings. I will be as will she. Good morning dawn and welcome twilight.